No announcement yet.


  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Running

    •We work out too much. We waste time. A friend of mine runs marathons. He always talks about this "runner's high." But he has to go 26 miles for it. That's why I smoke and drink. I get the same feeling from a flight of stairs.

    •This man and woman were making love when the woman cried out "Oh my God! I hear my husband coming! You must get out of here fast! Grab your clothes and jump out the window!" The man hurriedly jumped out the window and fell into some bushes. As luck would have it, it started to rain. He sat there, wondering what he was going to do when a bunch of joggers happened to jog by. The man quickly jumped up and joined the joggers. As he was running along with the rest of the joggers, one asked him "Do you always run in the nude?" The man answered, while gasping for air, "Oh yes, it feels so free having the air blow over your skin while you are running." Then another runner asked, "Do you always run carrying your clothes on your arm?" The man answered breathlessly, "Oh yes, that way I can get dressed at the end of the run and get in my car to go home." Then another runner asked "Do you always wear a condom when you run?" "Well," he answered, "only when it's raining."

    •You know it is time to resume running when...

    ◦You try to do a few pushups and discover that certain body parts refuse to leave the floor.
    ◦Your children look through your wedding album and want to know who mom's first husband was.
    ◦You get winded just saying the words "10 kilometer run".
    ◦You come to the conclusion that, if God really wanted you to touch your toes each morning, He would have put them somewhere around your knees.
    ◦You analyze your body honestly and decide what you should develop first is your sense of humor.
    ◦You step on a talking scale and it says, "Come back when you are alone".

  • #2